Ah, 24. The final tally of 24-related dreams while in Italy was two, although one of them was just dreaming about watching 24, if that makes any sense. That was just me dreaming that I saw previews of one episode when I hadn’t even seen the previous episode. It made me very upset, needless to say. But there were no DVR malfunctions. We’ll do 2 a.m. now and do 3 a.m. sometime before the week is over. And back to normal schedule of Tuesday afternoon-ish this coming week. Just so everyone has their schedules straight.
This was a pretty intense episode, although there was a bit too much gooey medical stuff for my liking. As MZ said, “What is this, 24 or House?” We get the introduction of the Chinese as this season’s very late antagonists. It’s all about China these days. Or maybe it was just that CNN International was the only TV station I really watched at night in Italy and they were constantly running ads for their upcoming Eye on China series. I think that might be it. Anyway, onto the rankings…
1. Chloe O’Brian (1) – We’ll keep Chloe at #1 since that whole Chinese Consulate break in didn’t go quite as planned. Chloe feels no remorse, no pain, no nothing after killing that bad dude. She’s not necessarily a cold-blooded killing machine – at least not yet – but this is just another sign that she is the woman for Jack.
2. Jack Bauer (2) – Hard to pin the blame on him for the Consulate mishap. Since those Chinese were obviously so inept at using firearms, I was expecting one of them to just leap the 50 feet or so it took to get to Jack, y’know, Jet Li or Ziyi Zhang style. As for the whole Paul situation, it needed to be done. The fact that it would surely get rid of Audrey for good surely did nothing to dissuade him.
3. Paul Raines (NR) – Well, it wasn’t hard to see that one coming once Jack made his peace with him. That was Paul receiving his last rites, basically. And really, what’s there to live for after Jack Bauer shows you that kind of appreciation and, frankly affection? A life as a paraplegic with Audrey hanging around you all the time? Seems like he got out while the getting out was good.
4. David Palmer (5) – So you mean to tell me that Jack and Palmer hadn’t kept in touch at all in the past 18 months? Nothing? Not even a Christmas card, or a “forward this to 20 of your friends and receive good luck!” chain e-mail? I find that a bit disappointing. Palmer did what he had to do with the Chinese. At least he made some sort of decision. It was really something how much he was put over in that first scene, with Novick, Logan and good ol’ Aaron all singing his praises.
5. Curtis Manning (6) – Relegated to background duty more or less – again – but you can tell things are starting to swing his way since Jack specifically asked that he be on the unit to infiltrate the Consulate.
6. Tony Almeida (9T) – Hey, check it out! Tony gets to do something and actually serve a purpose! But not before Michelle finds out about “the woman he happens to be living with.” Nice try, Tony. Must’ve slipped his mind. Ha. That was definitely my favorite Kevin McDonald character from Kids in the Hall. Maybe even my favorite character/sketch from that show. Back to Tony: “I’m not makin’ excuses; I’m just tellin’ it as it is.” He hasn’t done much this season, but you gotta give him credit for delivering a few nice quotes.
7. Bill Buchanan (3) – Kudos to Leee for pulling out a Bull Buchanan reference in the 4/25 24 wrap up on TYBE! You probably have no idea who that is – and Lord help you if you do – as he was a WWF wrestler a few years ago, sort of the early 2000s version of say, Dino Bravo, or something like that. Man, I just made a Dino Bravo reference. That is terrible. As for Bill, chill out, dude. You were on your way to consistent top five status. Don’t get all uppity at Tony. Maybe grow a soul patch of your own and see what happens with the ladies.
8. Lee Jong (NR) – So he wants immunity and protection, and wants it in a written guarantee from the President, eh? Never heard that one before on this show! Call it the Nina Myers Special.
9. Aaron Pierce (NR) – When Palmer came back last week I was wondering if were going to get some Aaron action. He’s still serving his country, and his son is too. What a model American family. Or something like that. If they ever make a Jim Gaffigan biopic – and it can’t be too far off, can it? – the guy who plays Pierce is all over that role.
10. Mike Novick (4) – Well, looks like my Novick infatuation lasted about two weeks. He still made a great Novick face early on, but it doesn’t seem like he’s up to anything conniving or undermining. He’s just being, like, helpful and supportive. That’s no fun.
11. Edgar Stiles (8) – It’s sweet that he’s concerned about Chloe. Or maybe this is just Edgar’s way of macking. Oh, who am I kidding? Edgar has no way of macking. Unless it’s Big Mac-ing! Whew. Note to self: No more writing the Power Rankings after midnight while still jet lagged.
12. Michelle Dessler (9T) – Seriously, is she doing anything around there? Besides answering the phone at inconvenient times?
13. Charles Logan (11) – I’m sure after he left Palmer in charge he went to take a couple of Advil for the neck pains incurred while staring straight up at David. Man, was that some heavy-handed symbolism or what? I hope he’s got Walt Cummings with him.
14. Audrey Raines (12) – OK, I’ll admit to feeling a little bad for Audrey. It’s been a rough day, for sure. She gets kidnapped, sees her boyfriend torture her husband, sees her husband get shot while protecting her boyfriend, has her father pull a Richie Edwards and then sees her boyfriend play god and decide to have her husband die. And despite all of that, which should make her quite sympathetic, she manages to be less likeable than just about all of the terrorists. Oh well.
Honorable Mention
Melissa Raab – That’s some nice translatin’, Melissa. She should team with Nabilla and the deceased Nicole the Sexy Terrorist for the all-24 ethnic hotties squad.
Su Ming – Deputy Consul dude seems pissed.
Conerned-Looking CTU Agent – I couldn’t tell if when they did the close up on him it was an “I’m up to no good” (evil) close up or an “I’m up to no good” (nervous) close up.
Koo Yin – Maybe if his death causes the beginning of World War III, there will be a revivalist post-punk band called Koo Yin in about 50 years or so.
Jen Slater – That’d be the woman who happens to be living with Tony, another winner of a female character on 24.
Dr. Benson – Most doctors work best at gunpoint, right?
Dropped Out … For Now
Habib Marwan – Need more than a previously recorded videotape to get in the rankings. Sorry, Marwan.
James Heller – (Twiddling thumbs.)
President Keeler – It would be a shock if he emerges from the coma this season, but I would guess he’d be around for the next season, depending on when it takes place.
Dropped Out (I’ve cleaned this section up a bit, taking out some of the more random people. Basically if you were in the actual rankings – or would have been earlier in the season – you’re still on here.)
Kevin Keeler (son on relaxing vacation with President is not a good scenario on 24), Nicole aka The Sexy Terrorist (she did good, an inspiration to female jihadists across the world), Mitch Anderson (yes, he had a getaway plan, but don’t you think getting shot down by a fighter jet put a crimp on that plan?), Behrooz Araz (I can’t imagine they’d keep him alive, can you?), Rafique the Worrisome Computer-y Terrorist (at least he got the classic bad guy final utterance in), Dina Araz (she's dead, folks), Dave Conlon (dead and a real bastard), Erin Driscoll (probably watching Shabby Chic, or something like that), Maya Driscoll (dead), Marianne Taylor (dead), Sarah Gavin (Who? Oh, right), Navi Araz (patricided), Richard Heller (Wait, maybe his dad sprung him loose and they are doing evil things together. Eh?), Kalil Hasan (dead), Omar the Terrorist (dead), Debbie Pendleton (dead), Ronnie Lavell (so dead).
Past Rankings
1 A.M.
Midnight
11 P.M.
10 P.M.
9 P.M.
8 P.M.
7 P.M.
6 P.M.
--DM--
I would've liked to have used a trademark Bull Buchanan line, but of course he had none. The bald goon.
Posted by: Leee | May 12, 2005 at 11:37 PM