Soi Disantra: We're Running Out of Time! 24 Power Rankings, 4 A.M.

May 17, 2005

We're Running Out of Time! 24 Power Rankings, 4 A.M.

When Tony delivered the old, “Everything that’s happened here today…” line, you knew that we were getting down to the wire. What the hell happened to the Chinese? Not even a token mention? I’m sure we’ll hear from them in next week’s finale, of which there will be no mention of previews or spoilers on this site, got it? Thanks. Next week we’ll double dip with the rankings. We’ll have the usual weekly rankings, and then later in the week we’ll have a complete season wrap-up with rankings of every major character of the season! So all you Araz family fans, get ready!

1. Mandy (NR) – Oh Mandy, you came and you helped Habib Marwan, and you walked around topless, oh Mandy, you killed Castle and kidnapped Almeida, what’s your fucking problem, oh Mandy. With apologies to Nicole the Sexy Terrorist and even my former true love, Nina Myers, there is but one Sexy Terrorist, and that is Mandy. I bet she’s hoping that mis-aisle (I like the way Marwan says it) takes out Palmer once and for all.
2. Habib Marwan (2) – It’s official: Marwan is officially The Slipperiest Motherfucker Alive, surpassing this kid. Congrats, Marwan. Anyone else hoping that they don’t actually catch him and he sticks around for another season, since he’s been the best villain they’ve had so far?
3. Mike Novick (5) – Oh man, Novick did enough scheming in this episode alone to make up for his nearly two-year absence. Well done, Mike. And you can tell he just relishes lying right to someone’s face. Like I said last week, I respect that in a man. Which is why when watching Shattered Glass over the weekend I felt this strange to connection to the title character. But that’s for another rambling post.
4. David Palmer (8) – He ranks below Novick because while he had a big hand in the manipulation, he didn’t get to do all the lying that Mike did. He just got to play a role. What would a season of 24 be without at least a bit of political deception? What’s that you say? Better? Yeah, you may have a point there. But, see: Novick, Mike.
5. Chloe O’Brian (3) – We’ve gotten to the point where even if Chloe is only in one scene – hell, even if she has only one line – you can be guaranteed that she will be entertaining. You can never be sure that any character (even Jack, I’d almost argue at this point) will survive any given episode on this show, but I think the writers are just having too much fun with Chloe to do anything to her in the near future. I might have been conservative in my head of CTU prediction for Season 12. Maybe more like Season 8 or 9 now.
6. Jack Bauer (4) – The lowest ever ranking for Jack. But that’s what happens when you let Marwan get away … again. It’s not even the fact that he let him get away, it’s the fact that I was fully expecting Marwan to escape. But I figure I can put Jack lower this week since next week is the finale, and if Jack doesn’t end up at the top of the list, well, that means something strange happened.
7. Charles Logan (15) – Well, wait to pull it together, Logan. I guess. If you can’t be presidential in your decision making, at least you can be presidential when it comes to deceptive politics. Although he wasn’t really that convincing. It’s just that the this Congressman Ashton character is a blowhard fool.
8. James Heller (NR) – So I guess he was just at the district office after all. Huh. Oh well. How about this – maybe if his hawkish, conservative administration would be a little more tolerant of alternative lifestyles, then his son wouldn’t have had to hide his gay rendezvous and then they could have been on to Mandy and her cohort a full day earlier. Eh?
9. Curtis Manning (6) – Jack: “I need a team, make sure Curtis is on it.” Buchanan: “But we need him for future seasons! Take someone more expendable, whose character is just about played out.” Also, wasn’t it nice that during the raid that freed Marwan, Jack and Curtis had convenient cover? Dodged a bullet there, so to speak. Wait, no, they did dodge actual bullets. No “so to speak” needed. Right now Curtis is totally like The Rock was in during his final days in The Corporation, just before he blew up big time. Or at least that’s what I’d say if I ever used to watch wrestling.
10. Tony Almeida (11T) – Man. I was almost surprised to see him make it out of the episode alive, but you’ve got to save at least one major death blow for the season finale. It’s been a good run, Almeida. You’ve shown strong resilience, getting shot in the neck only to be back on the job within hours, committing some serious treason (I guess there’s not really another kind) and being reinstated less than two years later. But it all comes full circle now. They’ll erect a small shrine of your Chicago Cubs mug for you at CTU, I’m sure.
11. Bill Buchanan (13) – I don’t think he did anything of note at all this week, but that means he wasn’t throwing his attitude around. So that’s a step in the right direction.
12. Lee Castle (NR) – Well, he lasted 21 episodes longer than Ronnie Lavell. So give him credit for that.
13. Michelle Dessler (11T) – You can’t spend another day without him, eh? That might not work out too well. Does she have treason in her? I’m not sure that she does. Buchanan’s not a bad Plan B, is he?
14. Audrey Raines (7) – I guess that was sort of cute when she thought that she’d be able to successfully interrogate her brother. Wait, I mean sort of stupid. Hey Audrey, ever heard anyone say, “We’re running out of time!” It especially means something when there’s a stealth nuclear mis-aisle headed toward the city where I fucking live!!! Stealth technology sure has been useful plot device to rely on for the writers this year.
15. Edgar Stiles (16) – Don’t think I’ve forgotten about last week, Edgar. Because I’m sure as hell that Cheng Zhi hasn’t forgotten and there will be consequences. Next week’s probably it for Edgar, wouldn’t you say? Have any other analysts besides Chloe repeated?
16. Richard Heller (NR) – Bah! That’s fuckin’ Trey! How could FOX do this? I guess I just didn’t notice since Heller’s disappearance and Trey’s appearance on The O.C. were timed rather well, but there is nothing worse than the collision of CTU and Orange County. I don’t want those worlds mixing at all. It doesn’t help that he’s basically playing the same pathetic character, just gayer and greasier. And poor Heller, they brought him in right before 4:20, too.

Honorable Mention
Don Ashton – Wasn’t he in The Stooges?

Dropped Out … For Now
Cheng Zhi – I’m looking forward to what he brings in the finale. Perhaps it will prove to be the impetus for Season 5’s plot?

Dropped Out
President Keeler (I think it’s safe to say we’ve seen the last of him for this season), Kevin Keeler (son on relaxing vacation with President is not a good scenario on 24), Nicole aka The Sexy Terrorist (she did good, an inspiration to female jihadists across the world), Mitch Anderson (yes, he had a getaway plan, but don’t you think getting shot down by a fighter jet put a crimp on that plan?), Behrooz Araz (I can’t imagine they’d keep him alive, can you?), Rafique the Worrisome Computer-y Terrorist (at least he got the classic bad guy final utterance in), Dina Araz (she's dead, folks), Dave Conlon (dead and a real bastard), Erin Driscoll (probably watching Shabby Chic, or something like that), Maya Driscoll (dead), Marianne Taylor (dead), Sarah Gavin (Who? Oh, right), Navi Araz (patricided), Kalil Hasan (dead), Omar the Terrorist (dead), Debbie Pendleton (dead), Ronnie Lavell (so dead).

Past Rankings
3 A.M.
2 A.M.
1 A.M.
Midnight
11 P.M.
10 P.M.
9 P.M.
8 P.M.
7 P.M.
6 P.M.

--DM--

May 17, 2005 | Permalink

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» 24: SEASON FOUR - 4 AM - 5 AM from Mike's Blog
Oh geez. Where to start? This was an absolutely fantastic episode (sans the speaker of the house crap). Here are my thoughts: In accordance with the prophecy, Tony and Michelle "can't live another day without each other." Unfortunately, anoth... [Read More]

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May 17, 2005

We're Running Out of Time! 24 Power Rankings, 4 A.M.

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