Trapped Inside the Song: Silver Jews Song Power Rankings -- All of 'Em (Almost)

Sorry for the relative lack of material here on SD this week. It’s been sort of hectic around here, lots of stuff going on. And I think that we’ve been getting a bit carried away with the whole Power Rankings thing lately, so maybe this’ll be the last one of those you see for a couple weeks. Or you could see one on Monday. Who knows? Anyway, I’ve decided to rank out the 43 Silver Jews songs from their four proper albums. We won’t count The Arizona Records because I can’t find my copy, although I’m sure it’s under a pile somewhere. We won’t count Dime Map of the Reef, even though we still have DP’s copy. I think it’s legally ours now. Sorry, DP. If we were going to include any extra tracks, it would probably be the three from the Tennessee EP, but we’ll leave those out of it. So just the four “real” albums. I’d say that hopefully this will stir up some debate, but I doubt it will. But feel free to chime in with your own Top 10, or if you want to do all 43, well, power to you.

1. How to Rent a Room
Depending on what mood I’m in, the first three can be shifted around. But when it comes down to it, this one probably take the cake. MZ is a huge Natural Bridge fan, while I’d take American Water and Starlite Walker first, but this is DCB at his best. It’s funny, it’s touching, it’s sad, all in the perfect amounts.
2. Advice to the Graduate
If I’m feeling like I need a dose of SM with my Joos, this would be the pick. And if you’re a true indie rocker, this has been the outgoing message on your answering machine at some point in your life.
3. Blue Arrangements
That slightly fucked-up solo at the end is perfect. I actually wish DCB’s vocals were a little higher in the mix, SM kind of overwhelms him on this one. But when SM sings on his own at the beginning of the last verse, that’s some great stuff.
4. Random Rules
5. I Remember Me
I like to call this “the saddest song of all time.” I haven’t ever stopped to think if it actually is, but it’s definitely a tear jerker. As great as it is – and it’s perfect – my only issue with Bright Flight is that the two best songs go as far as you possibly can without being too … cute isn’t the word. But maybe it is.
6. Rebel Jew
The story of my life.
7. New Orleans
One time back in 9th grade I was singing this song and one of my friends asked me why I was singing that old classic rock song and I was like, “Huh?” I didn’t even get the “not the one you heard about I’m talking ‘bout another house” reference. So three of the top seven come from Starlite Walker.
8. Tennessee
The best song ever with a line about “hot middle aged women.”
9. The Wild Kindness
10. Black and Brown Blues
Radio show title plucked from this song: “Fake IDs and Honey Bees.”
11. Send in the Clouds
The namesake for this site and my original radio show title doesn’t quite crack the top 10.
12. People
The most underrated song on American Water.
13. Dallas
I think a lot of people like this one better than I do. It might not crack the top 20 if I didn't always have Odalis Perez on my team.
14. Slow Education
15. Inside the Golden Days of Missing You
16. Honk If You’re Lonely
17. The Frontier Index
18. Trains Across the Sea
Let’s assume that in the first 10 years, zero beers were consumed. Figure from ages 11 to 14, 2,000 beers were consumed. That’s a lot, more than one per day, and that’s not even up to high school. So that leaves 48,000 beers for 13 years. That’s just over 10 beers per day. I’m not sure if this adds up.
19. Pet Politics
How bad is Darnielle's cover of this? Anyone?
20. Night Society
Definitely my favorite of the instrumentals.
21. Let’s Not and Say We Did
22. Albermarle Station
23. We Are Real
Radio show title plucked from this song: “All My Favorite Singer’s Couldn’t Sing.”
24. Pan American Blues
Maybe this is a bit high, but since DCB stopped writing songs like this after SW, I’ve always been pretty fond of it.
25. Smith & Jones Forever
26. Pretty Eyes
27. Living Waters
28. Rooms Games & Diamond Rain
29. Horseleg Swastikas
Bright Flight was the first Joos album that actually sounded like what you’d expect from a Joos album. These are good songs, they just aren’t that exciting.
30. Tide to the Oceans
31. The Moon Is Number 18
32. Like Like The The The Death
33. Death of an Heir of Sorrows
And another thing about BF, I feel that a few songs were just updated versions of songs from Natural Bridge. Like this with “Pretty Eyes.”
34. The Country Diary of a Subway Conductor
I love the little boat!
35. Friday Night Fever
Best George Strait cover ever.
36. Introduction II
37. Buckingham Rabbit
38. The Right to Remain Silent
39. Time Will Break the World
40. Transylvania Blues
41. The Silver Pageant
42. Ballad of a Reverend War Character
43. Federal Dust
Maybe the only Joos song that I actually dislike. And it’s one of the few that SM co-wrote! See, I’m objective.

--DM--

Comments

[Capt. B]

My top two (representing, alternately, god and the devil): "How to Rent a Room" and "I Remember Me"

"I Remember Me" is usually the devil because, like the devil, it hurts me over and over again and when I hear it I think about the painful sadness of DCB's vision and how truly eternal suffering can be.

"How to Rent a Room" is usually god (albeit a pagan god) because it takes me "there," man, and shows me that salvation is not an end in itself...but only a beginning of the end that used to be my friend, man.

Either way, I'm still weeping my balls off.

[MZ]

Now that is one gross image.

[JK]

Hmmm...I guess you don't find "I remember me" as trite and unlistenable as I do. Actually, I think there's little on BF that's more than mediocre. Hopefully the new one will be better.

Albemarle Station is in my top 10 though. It's better than any fucking instrumental in any case. And Trains across the Sea > Rebel Jew. But maybe you've gotta be Jewish to get it.

[ZR]

Trains across the sea is definitely my all-time Joos fave

[dana]

I can't believe in that entire list there was no room for "Pretty Eyes."

[DM]

It's there, probably not as high as you'd like at #26. It's tough, y'know? That was actually the one song I felt I put far too low after looking at it again. The cowboy/now boy rhyme is great, and the image of DCB hosing down an elephant always brings a smile to my face.

I have a slight thing about songs with a complete lack of drums, though.

[dana]

Oh, whoops. I guess I didn't read far enough. I was too hopped up on outrage.

The lyrics are so good, and also I love the placement of the song on the album...such a perfect bookend to "How to Rent a Room," which is one of my top three SJ songs.

[Emily H.]

I would like to add that "Horseleg Swastikas" would also make a kind of good radio show title.

[DM]

Eh, I don't think so. Not that DCB could have known when he wrote it, but now it just sounds like something Carlos D would call some lame dance night he DJ'd.

[ZR]

No, that'd be "Herpes Swastikas"

[arealgoodgirl]

I agree with number one all the way.

[dan.p.]

so i guess i am about a month late on this. but some things still need to be said in this comments section...
first of which pains me to say as a longtime staunch supporter of the mtn goats: he brutalitizing "pet politics" on the believer CD (which is worth yr $8 anyway). speaking of the mtn goats... anyone want to help me make a john darnielle power ranking list? it should take a few people a couple months.
where are the arizona records songs? i forget what those dime map of the reef songs sound like, but you've had ample opportunity to listen repeatedly, right? but what is missing from this list, which would be in my top 10 is a little song called "famous eyes" (from hey drag city) -- way better than "pretty eyes".
i am eager to see how some of the new songs crack the charts. i think tanglewood has some of the best song titles in the DCB oeuvre: "Freezing in the Shadow of Your Knee", "How Can I Love You (If You Won't Lie Down?)", and most definitely, "Punks in the Beerlight"

also, what is the singer possesing in this title: “All My Favorite Singer’s Couldn’t Sing.”

[I used to look exactly like DCB before I got fat]

Totally agree with "How to Rent a Room" at the top. But my man, don't fall prey to the whole 'Love the band, Hate the Single' thing. Of course the Joos don't have singles but "Punks in the Beerlight" is the equivalent in their world -- most popular song on latest album. PITBL should be in the top 10 if not top 5. You have SM and WO (BPB) on guitar, great lyrics, and Cassie's sweet voice.

If you think about it -- DCB almost always kicks off the album with the best song. . Trains Across the Sea (ignore Into). HTRAR. Random Rules. PITBL. He always grabs your attention whether it's the first song or the first line of each song ... "Fast Cars, Fine Ass, These Things Will Pass..."

[MZ]

Really? Pit stains and all?
This post predates Tanglewood's release/leak, that's why there's no PITBL or anything else. You can read DM's epic thoughts on Tanglewood here:
http://soidisantra.typepad.com/soi_disantra/2005/09/tangled_up_in_j.html
part two (I told you it was epic):
http://soidisantra.typepad.com/soi_disantra/2005/09/tangled_up_in_j_1.html

[DM]

Thanks for pointing that out, MZ. My love of "Punks" is well documented on this site, in life in general and in my fantasy team names. (Baseball team = Burnouts in Love, football team = Toulouse-Lautrec!) It was my #1 song of 2005. (http://soidisantra.typepad.com/soi_disantra/2006/01/dms_25_songs_of.html) Whenever I pass the Panda Maxx Chinese restaurant on my walk home from work, in my head I'm chanting, "I love you Panda Maxx! I love you Panda Maxx!"

[I used to look exactly like DCB before I got fat]

Thanks for the link to the Tanglewood write-ups. I agree with virtually every word of DM's take on the album/individual songs. One thing worth noting is that my 3 year old daughter loves to sing along with the chorus of track #2 -- "Sometimes a pony, soemtimes a pony, sometimes a pony gets depreSSed." Maybe DCB should consider a children's album -- he'd likely make a lot more money, assuming he can stay away from delving into substance abuse-related lyrics for 8-10 songs, or mentioning cum a couple of times.

[John Mullenholz]

This list is funny, it’s touching, it’s sad, all in the perfect amounts, but mostly sad.

[Lolinasin]

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[JSK]

I love People. I think its the best song on that album. I am only familiar with American Water, but that song rocks. I also can't figure out what that stupid soi disantra means...