Soi Disantra: An Hour of The Alternative

August 21, 2006

An Hour of The Alternative

What?! I'm still around? Yep, I am. Anyway, here's a take on last night's The Alternative. Only the first hour. Because really, isn't that plenty? And the Yankees/Red Sox game was still on. Can those motherfuckers ever finish a game on the same day it starts?

1. New Order -- "Bizarre Love Triangle"
A solid enough opener, especially since The Alternative certainly isn't shy about playing stuff from Republic. For some reason I've been listening to the Warsaw stuff fairly frequently as of late. I think that reason is because it's really awesome. Is it wrong to like that better than either Joy Division or New Order?

2. The Polecats -- "Make a Circuit With Me"
Can't say I'm too knowledgable about these dudes. At least I think they're dudes; the video doesn't really provide conclusive evidence. The only way to describe the lead singer is as some sort of new wave/rockabilly version of Carrot Top. One of those just unscionably ridiculously looking bands, but a decent enough little tune.

3. Iggy Pop -- "Cry for Love"
Wow was this terrible. Think of the most processed, cheesy, '80s sounding bullshit you can imagine and that's this song. Just pathetic. Not even ZR will be able to defend this.

4. R.E.M. -- "The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonite
On the bright side, it wasn't either of the overrated, mega-overplayed ones ("Losing My Relgion," "Everybody Hurts") and it wasn't one of the pure shit ones ("Radio Song," "Shiny Happy People"). But this came on right after an ad for a contest where you can win a trip to Georgia to see reunited R.E.M., and it also mentioned their upcoming CD of greatest hits from the I.R.S. era. (Isn't that basically Eponymous?) So it was sort of a tease. I don't think SD has really given its official take on R.E.M. Here's a brief take: great band, obviously, but I think I needed to be there when it was happening (and by that I mean those I.R.S. years) to consider them a pantheon band. Also, New Adventures in Hi-Fi -- very underrated.

5. Material Issue -- "Diane"
This was obviously a very pleasant surprise. A recent member of the ROL Club, this was the "Concept Version" of the video. I've seen this a few other times, I believe, because I definitely remember thinking, "Boy does he look a lot like Britt Daniel." At least in that video. Not as much in this clip of the band performing "Diane" on Dennis Miller Live. In the video Jim Ellison is playing ... you know those guitars, that are like, double guitars, you know? Also, Diane, in the video -- not the most graceful of ladies, but charming nonetheless.

6. Inspiral Carpets -- "Two Worlds Collide"
No, not for me. So big and bombastic and textured. The opposite of most everything I go for. I have a feeling that people who like this probably go big time for Muse. And you know SD's feelings on Muse.

7. James -- "Born of Frustration"
Again, no, sorry. Too British, too sweeping, too much damn singing. By the end of the song the lead singer (I believe his name is James?) is doing some silly Geronimo chant. Still much better than Inspiral Carpets.

8. The Cure -- "Pictures of You"
This was from a recent live show, within the past couple of years. So that was disappointing. I mean, it's an excellent song, it's hard to deny that. But the Cure ... again, just a little too much singing, too much drama. I officially feel that "I like" the Cure, but if you like the Cure, you probably like them more than me. Does that make sense? Once I got to high school, I was pretty much over them.

9. Blur -- "She's So High"
Man do they look like huge dorks in this video. Pretty great song, though, one of the better shameless Stone Roses ripoffs. Blur's one of those bands that I look back and say, "Hmm, I suppose I can see why I was really into them for that short time." I think a part of it was that for some reason I had about 100 cassingles of "Song 2"/"M.O.R." that I gave to all my friends (yes, I had plenty of extras) and was pretty into that and Parklife at the same time. Still can't quite comprehend why I liked 13 so much, though...

10. Depeche Mode -- "A Question of Lust"
Martin Gore may sing this one, but Gahan is still the highlight of the video, with his silhouetted, twirling tambourine playing. Sounds cool, no? Also, it's the highlight because man does this song blow. That's what I wrote down in my little notebook. It's one of those that about a third of the way through you're like, "Eh, this isn't really the greatest, is it?" and by the end it's just, "This flat out blows." If Gahan would have died back when he tried to make it happen and they made a biopic right then, David Duchovny would have really been the only choice for the lead role. As for Martin Gore? Perhaps the lovechild of Edward Scissorhands and the Flock of Seagulls guy? OK, I guess that's more or less just the Flock of Seagulls dude.

11. Nine Inch Nails -- "Down In It"
I admit that I still remembered the first eight or so lines to this one. Hearing it in the same hour as New Order, it's easy to realize that this is basically the same exact thing except with a really angry dude who really hates jocks singing. We all know about Trent Reznor's lyrical prowess; this one isn't really one of his worst, but the "I used to be so big and strong/I used to know my right from wrong/I used to never be afraid/I used to be somebody" part is pretty special. And by special I do indeed mean retarded.

12. Peter Murphy -- Who the Fuck Knows?
Missed the title of this one. Whatever. Fulfilling The Alternative's quota for over-produced solo crap from former lead singers of '80s bands that were overrated to begin with.

13. Garbage -- "Only Happy When It Rains"
Nope. Never understood Garbage and never understood the Shirley Manson appeal. I suppose if you're into Scottish clown-looking women, she may be your thing. As for Garbage, just so processed. That's not what music sounds like, is it? Also, what's the deal with the title? Supposedly it's an homage to JAMC, but I'm sure the Reids are like, "Uh, yeah, thanks, appreciate it." Maybe Butch Vig thought, "Hey, I produced Nevermind, I can get away with this." But you know what, Butch? You did a shitty job on Nevermind. This is another one of those songs where right after it starts I was like, "Oh, right, I don't remember this one being too terrible" and by the end I was like, "Yeah, my memory really does suck."

--DM--

August 21, 2006 | Permalink

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August 21, 2006

An Hour of The Alternative

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